In divorce, both parties make mistakes. Even if you did not instigate the divorce, you need to seek forgiveness for things you did when you were married and during the divorce process.
"Regardless of what he did to me, the way I responded to him was my responsibility," says Selma. "When I was able to assume responsibility for myself, I was able to forgive him for what he did, and I was able to heal."
In the Bible, Paul wrote a letter to the Corinthian church about their recent wrongs. When they read the letter and realized their wrong behaviors, they chose to repent instead of becoming angry. They took responsibility for their wrongdoings. They experienced godly sorrow, which leads to repentance, salvation, and no regret. Read this section of Paul's letter and consider how it applies to your situation.
"I am happy . . . because your sorrow led you to repentance. For you became sorrowful as God intended and so were not harmed in any way by us. Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death.
"See what this godly sorrow has produced in you: what earnestness, what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what alarm, what longing, what concern, what readiness to see justice done. At every point you have proved yourselves to be innocent in this matter. So even though I wrote to you, it was not on account of the one who did the wrong or of the injured party, but rather that before God you could see for yourselves how devoted . . . you are" (2 Corinthians 7:9-12).