Forgiveness is when you refuse to let the other person's actions and attitudes dictate your actions and attitudes.
Selma shares, "It finally hit me that when I had been saying, 'I forgive him for what he did to me,' I was not really forgiving him. Inside, I was thinking, Yes, I assume some responsibility for all of this, but I wouldn't have done it if he hadn't done whatever he did to me first. Regardless of what he did to me, the way I responded to him was totally my responsibility, not his."
When you say you accept some of the responsibility for things that have happened, are you sure your actions and attitude are reflecting your words? Forgiveness and taking responsibility involve more than saying the right words. They are both actions. Think about what actions you can take that will show you have forgiven the other person and that will show you are taking responsibility for yourself.
"Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud. . . . Do not repay anyone evil for evil. . . . If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. . . . 'If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.' Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good" (Romans 12:16-18, 20-21).