Spend Time Together

Be there for your children! You have to be there emotionally as well as physically. Children can sense if you are only giving them your presence; they want and need all of your attention.

"I drew a lot closer to my kids," says Lee. "I really made myself available to them. The first Christmas we had, which was only three months after my wife left, was a wonderful Christmas. The children and I had anticipated dreading it, but we built new memories; we started some new traditions; and we stayed up until three o'clock in the morning.

"I realized how important it was just to be there. I found that with kids you can't sit down and say, 'Let's talk about it' and expect them to immediately open up. You have to give them your presence, and maybe three or four hours into an innocent evening of fun, they will open up with their feelings and concerns. Sometimes it's three in the morning! So you have to change your lifestyle a little bit to be available for them."

Enjoy the time you spend with your children. Think of activities you can do that involve talking and laughing together—play a card game, have an ice cream sundae party, have a make-your-own pizza night, clean the basement together while listening to upbeat music, or ask each other getting-to-know-you questions, such as "What's your favorite …?

"For our earthly fathers disciplined us for a few years, doing the best they knew how. But God's discipline is always right and good for us because it means we will share in his holiness" (Hebrews 12:10 NLT).