Thursday, November 12, 2009

Anger: The Emotion of Self-Preservation

Has your former spouse threatened your sense of self-worth? Sue says, "Probably the worst day is when I confronted him and said, 'I could jump out of the second story window and splatter myself on the street, and I think you would probably be happy. There was no response from him except for, 'That's not true.' By the expression on his face I could tell his heart; there really were no feelings there."

Does your former spouse acknowledge your needs?

Harriet says, "It dawned on me one day. Why should he change? Why should he get rid of the other woman? He had the best of both worlds. He had a loving wife who kept his home clean and neat and entertained well; she had a good job and a beautiful son and was well respected in the community. Then he had his other life with his mistress. He was like a cat with a great big bowl of cream in front of him."

Has your former spouse flagrantly ignored your convictions?

When your self-worth is threatened or your convictions are being trampled on, you will want to lash out. Anger deriving from self-preservation can be justified as long as you are expressing it in a way that is healthy. Start by bringing your anger to God. He can handle it.

"Casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you" (1 Peter 5:7 NASB).

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