Why Is the Anger So Deep?

Because . . .

You loved your spouse with all your heart.

You gave so much of yourself to him/her.

You worked at the relationship.

You trusted your spouse.

You were faithful.

You went to church, believed in God, and tried to live right.

You thought you'd be together forever.

"You never think that you're going to get kicked in the teeth, but stuff happens, and you do," says Joanne.

"Your feelings are going to be overpowering sometimes, but I think people are much worse off if they don't let those feelings rage through their bodies. You have to rage, pounding your fists. You have to scream, whine, moan, and complain to your nearest and dearest friends; you have to do whatever you can to let it pass through your system."

Divorce brings an abrupt end to things that you thought were good, right, and secure in your life. Now you aren't sure which parts of your married life were real and which parts were only illusions. You are not wrong to feel anger. Justified anger can be a good and necessary response.

Jesus showed righteous anger when he saw people buying and selling their goods in the temple, making a profit from religious activities rather than revering God.

"Jesus entered the temple area and drove out all who were buying and selling there. He overturned the tables of the money changers and the benches of those selling doves. 'It is written,' he said to them, 'My house will be called a house of prayer,' but you are making it a 'den of robbers'" (Matthew 21:12-13).